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Post by DALLAS BRENT NORRIS on Jan 21, 2010 12:18:06 GMT -5
It was night and oh man it was cold. Dallas folded an arm, trying to get his coat to warm him. Which was pretty dumb considering his intentions standing in front of the railing, using his free hand to hang on to a column. Would Blaze be disappointed? Would he blame himself? Yeah well... Dallas couldn't live for him. Blaze would know that. But he should've said thank you for all that he's done for him. For letting him in the band, for being his friend, helping him with it all, that he did all that he could and more than he needed to. He didn't have to do any of that. Dallas was endlessly grateful but ashamed to have been a burden. It wasn't fair.
He'd never understand why he needed to do this. Why he always wanted to do this, no matter how good or bad life was, he felt as if his time was up and waiting for him to give it back. Why did he feel like this? He was tired of feeling like this. So hopeless and worthless, and for no particular reason too! Just his body, his brain, something was wrong with it. Everyone else here actually had problems, had rotten childhoods and parents waiting for them back home. He was so normal, he had good parents. It's just always been like this. As if the wrong soul came to the wrong body for the wrong parents once conceived. He swallowed dryly staring down at the ground. "Come on... do it." he whispered to himself. Why couldn't he do it? Why was he so lost between death and life? Why was he so unable to commit to either one?
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Post by CHARLOTTE LOUISE TAYLOR on Jan 21, 2010 18:46:53 GMT -5
Charlotte needed some fresh air, away from everyone, just for a while. She wanted to try writing some lyrics and putting music to them but it was tough. Her brain felt like it was going to explode, so she made her way up to the roof. She had never been up there before so she got a little lost at first, but she found it. A gust of chilled air whipped her hair around her face. Blinded, momentarily, she turned to head towards a railing to look out and see the dark landscape below her. Finally her hair pulled away from her eyes, she turned back and jumped, with an involuntary "oh my..." she didnt finish her sentence. She had seen the boy, on the wrong side of the railing, staring at the ground with that look on his face. She knew that look all too well. Maybe it was the wind, maybe it was the memories, but her eyes started to water and she took a deep breath. "Hey..." she said, quietly and slowly stepping towards him. Charlie didn't know who he was or why he was doing this but she knew she had to stop him. "Youre on the wrong side," she tried to make her voice light but she was unable to keep the concern from her voice.
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Post by DALLAS BRENT NORRIS on Jan 21, 2010 19:23:01 GMT -5
'Hey, you're on the wrong side.' Wait, he wasn't alone? He looked over his shoulder at her, a complete stranger he's never seen before. "D-don't come any closer." he warned, staring at her then back at the ground. He couldn't believe this. She totally ruins this. Who knew you could ruin a suicide, but she did it. He exhaled sharply and looked at her. "Go away. This doesn't... This doesn't concern you." Oh please leave, he'd just become a burden for her and Blaze. It was cold, no one should be out here... that's why he was surprised, he thought for sure no one would come out up here. He was wrong.
ooc; good post santi. this is short, sorry.
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Post by CHARLOTTE LOUISE TAYLOR on Jan 21, 2010 19:32:20 GMT -5
Charlotte stopped when he told her not to come closer. For now, she'd listen to him, not wanting to scare him into acting hastily. "Iiiim..." dragged out her word, almost about to apologize but she stopped "Im not leaving' she informed him. Calmly, at least on the outside, she leaned her elbows on the railing, taking a deep breath of the sharp air. "Look." Charlie would get right down to business "I've been there... and I got a second chance, and I regret even considering... the easy way out. It isnt worth it. trust me." she told him softly, glancing over at him. Charlie wished she had the magical words to say that would instantly change his mind but she didnt know if it would be as easy as telling him not to. From experience, she knew it probably would not be.
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Post by DALLAS BRENT NORRIS on Jan 21, 2010 20:10:02 GMT -5
For just a second he thought she would actually leave. Alot of kids would do that. They'd say, 'not my problem' and walk away, leave him to it. Then she stated she wouldn't leave. "You should." he replied. There were no words to express how much he wanted her to leave. It isn't worth it, trust me. He took his eyes off the ground below and to her. "What? How do I know if it's worth it for me?" he asked, needing an answer before he took the jump or went on the other side of the railing. It was so cold, that he was shivering a little. Something opened up in him and he admitted; "I don't want to... but I don't want to live. I can't live but I can't die. I try and I can't."
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Post by CHARLOTTE LOUISE TAYLOR on Jan 21, 2010 20:17:04 GMT -5
Charlotte considered her options for a moment. "You don't know. Life might suck, but theres always tomorrow, and tomorrow and tomorrow." A little Macbeth there. Only this time she was preventing death, not mourning one. "Theres always chances to make it better. I discovered I love to sing, and play the piano. I gained a new appreciation for life... I..." it all sounded hollow and fake to her. This wouldnt be enough to convince even herself, when she had been in his state of mind.
Finally, she made her decision and she looked over at him again, meeting his eyes. "My mother died when I was born. And my father practically abandoned me. All my life, ive been on medication, I've been alone, I've been miserable. Then one day... my dad was killed. And I felt exactly like you do right now, there was nothing to live for, i was a waste of space, nothing would ever be right for me. Sooo..." she inhaled sharply, looking away, down at her hands as she picked at her nails nervously. "I downed a bunch of pills and tried to do the deed... but the house keeper came in and saw me." she breathed. "I woke up days later, feeling like I had died and gone to hell. But actually... id just had my stomach pumped. And for weeks, I was miserable, and afraid Id try to do it again. Then... i discovered music, and friends, and... my therapist. And now I know that I have to cherish the time I have right now. Because you know... anything could happen. And... and i know... i know you dont know me. But ive never told that to anybody before, and... I know exactly how you feel. I have been there, trust me... And I'm telling you... dont do this. Please." Her eyes met his again and she held out her hand to him.
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Post by DALLAS BRENT NORRIS on Jan 21, 2010 20:43:24 GMT -5
He was listening to her every word at first, feeling as if he was talking to Blaze. He was great but he didn't 'get' it. Then she stopped and looked away. Great, was she giving up? No, she was taking a different route. She told him her story. Dallas' eyes widened, she looked like she was a volunteer. Not a student with problems or a past... 'Trust me', stuck out to him. She just told him something she hasn't told anyone else. The last time he heard 'trust me' it was from Blaze and Blaze has never disappointed him... So while Dallas wasn't fully convinced, he reached for her hand. He crossed to the other side, to life and sat down. "I'm sorry." he said to her, feeling incredibly vunerable. "I... like music and I have friends. But, I still feel like this." he said. What was the point of hiding the way he felt? She knew what he felt. She saved him.
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Post by CHARLOTTE LOUISE TAYLOR on Jan 21, 2010 20:55:53 GMT -5
Relief washed over her like the complete ocean dumping on her head. Her life connected to his through their hands as he climbed back over. She didnt let go as she sat down next to him. "It'll take some time... but you won't regret this decision in the end" Charlotte promised him. It was quiet for a moment, she looked at him and smiled "My name is Charlotte. Whats yours?" she asked somewhat cheerfully.
"its a little chilly up here..." Charlotte added finally. "Want to go get some hot chocolate with me or something?" Charlotte had no plan, but she would just be his friend, and support him and try and help him out of this. Kind of like Dylan had been there to support her almost. Only she felt like she and this stranger were somehow bonded, not only by this experience but by the fact they were both in the same boat, at least in one point, and they both got it. People like them needed to stick together.
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Post by DALLAS BRENT NORRIS on Jan 21, 2010 21:06:05 GMT -5
He felt... empty. He wished he could fast forward and SEE if it all turns up later. Why waste his time? She looked very happy that he was with her. "Dallas." he answered, forcing a shy smile back at her. Charlotte fit her, he said looking at her more closely. He was trusting her, she was making promises he hoped would keep. But life was unpredictable, who knows?
He nodded. "Yeah, sure. It is cold." He rose to his feet and let her lead the way. They walked to the cafeteria downstairs and got a mug of hot chocolate the volunteers were making. Finding a table in the more quiet area of the dining room, they sat down. He stared at his drink, feeling weird about how he was thirsty and ready to drink this down when just moments ago he thought he had no future. He felt awkward, misplaced, almost like a ghost or something. He looked at Charlotte, his life-saver. "How long have you been here?" he asked, not yet touching his drink.
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Post by CHARLOTTE LOUISE TAYLOR on Jan 21, 2010 21:17:52 GMT -5
Dallas. Charlie liked that name. When they were finally off the room, she felt even better. Being closer to the ground sort of confirmed the situation, for now anyways. She was just hoping she could somehow help him out of the slump he was in. When they finally sat down, she got her first good look at him. It had been quite dark up on the roof and she hadn't been concentrating on his face. The girl was surprised to see how handsome he was, up close and in the light like this. Then she realized that he had asked her a question and she blushed a little, needing to get her brain back in thinking mode. "um... just a few months." she said softly, taking a sip of her hot chocolate and letting the warmth radiate onto her face for a few seconds. "What about you?" she asked finally, looking at him curiously. Charlotte couldnt remember seeing him around much but she had been rather distracted recently with some drama.
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Post by DALLAS BRENT NORRIS on Jan 22, 2010 18:00:02 GMT -5
In the lighting, Charlotte was someone completely different then he had expected. She was beautiful and the word 'angel' came to his mind. He felt intimidated and embarassed that she had to save him, embarassed that he still wanted to do it. He had to start talking to get his mind off of her looks and how humiliated this all was. A few months, explains why this was the first time he's seen her. "I've been here since I was fifteen." he answered. Quite a few people are surpised whenever they learn this. They sometimes thought he was reasonably new and a new member in Blaze's band. Dallas simply didn't care to enter the crazy social scene. It was Blaze who always dragged him out when he did get out. Blaze knew how to live and Dallas considered himself still of student, a failing one that is. Charlotte... Charlotte... "Didn't you do a concert a while ago, at the high ground maybe? I think I heard something about you..."
ooc; okay, so plot idea? like really, just so they bond and stuff. maybe dallas gets charlotte into the band as an honorary member maybe? then maybe they teach other guitar/piano? start writing songs together. he starts working to be a volunteer, so i don't know how that can turn into anything plotwise. blah D= any ideas?!
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Post by CHARLOTTE LOUISE TAYLOR on Jan 22, 2010 22:32:54 GMT -5
Aww, Charlotte never considered herself boy crazy, but this boy certainly caught her attention. "Oh wow, I guess in a way that could be a blessing and a curse huh?" she sympathized, unable to imagine spending years on end here. Her blue eyes drifted down to her mug of hot chocolate, absently watching the creamy film on top dissolve away. Then Dallas brought up her High Ground performance and she laughed sheepishly, shrugging and looking quite embarrassed. "Yeeah, I did... it wasnt that great..." On top of being nervous, she had been completely helpless against the creepers in the room, and it had been the whole beginning of her awkwardness with Dylan. She didnt like to think about it too much. "I've sung better." she smiled. Now that they were both face to face in the light, Charlotte was struggling with her shyness. She didnt want to be shy, she wanted to prove to him not to try and commit suicide again. Her mind was already racing with things that could possibly happen.
ooc;
I GOT THIS.
ok. let me get into thinking mode. xD
UM. ok.
Welll maybe Charlie sets up liiike a scavenger hunt or something where he has to like fiinnd a surprise. xD idk. if its winter that might not work out unless its inside someplace... i dont know
OR LIKE
every day she leaves a note for him in a secret place
or does cute things like that
OH OH. she starts liiike falling for him and she gets scared because she's never been in any kind of affectionate relationship before and there could be stuff going on with that? it could help with some dallas development as well if youw anted xD what do you think? did that spawn any ideas?
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Post by DALLAS BRENT NORRIS on Jan 22, 2010 22:56:13 GMT -5
He smiled a little. "I guess so. The people here kind of become your family though. I sort of decided to keep staying here anyway." True, he came here after a suicide attempt. He hated this place at first but then he met Blaze in the music room. Dallas tried to go back home but everytime he relasped into that same phase and returned here. He saw his parents regularly enough anyway and they spoke on the phone from time to time. The steam from the hot chocolate rose from their cups, giving off a warmth. He let it mist in his face.
She immediately looked quite embarassed. Looking at her for once in the lighting he smiled wider. "That's not what I heard. Someone told me they wanted encore." he said, before glancing down at his cup... Man, his suicide has definitely taken a radical turn in direction. "Maybe you could sing with the band I'm in sometime?" he said a little nervously after a moment of awkward quiet.
ooc;
geneeeuss. i like it! haha xD
i like the scavenger hunt and note thing! kind of gives him a reason to wake up in the morning haha.
then he gets shy because he starts falling for her. so one day say something good happens to him so he's like 'will you go out with me?' and maybe charlie says yes. but then she gets insanely nervous and stands him up?
she can be the one like 'i don't know...' and he'll be like 'iheartyou!' so she says sorry and they try again. this time it's all going well until maybe blaze enters the picture? i can't really picture blaze being mean though, but it makes things awkward and charlie's like 'are you sure we should be together?'
i'm rambling and what's worse it's going no where. usually when i ramble i get somewhere...>>; but yeah, totally love the scavenger hunt idea. i can see them always passing notes to each other in class and stuff too.
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Post by CHARLOTTE LOUISE TAYLOR on Jan 22, 2010 23:09:13 GMT -5
"Really?" Charlotte asked meekly, looking from her drink back up to him again. All she remembered from that night were uncomfortable memories, not things she liked to keep in mind. Then he brought up the band and this sparked her interest "You have a band?" she asked curiously. He had mentioned liking music earlier, but this was interesting news. Charlotte didnt know many other musicians yet, other than Blaze of course. most of the HIgh Ground performances were... well. Not always amazing or by people she would want to hang out with. "That sounds like it would be fun" Charlie gave a little grin, genuinely thinking that would be pretty awesome.
ooc:
aww yeah :] its gonna be cuuuuuuute
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Post by DALLAS BRENT NORRIS on Jan 23, 2010 15:55:50 GMT -5
Have a band? He shook his head. "No, I'm in one... it's my friend Blaze's band. You should meet him." he said, unaware that they already knew each other. It won't surprise him though. Blaze was a social guy who made friends incredibly easy. Unlike him, most people rarely knew he existed- even when on stage! After all he was only a back up vocal and rythm guitarist. Not that he minded, he liked keeping a low profile. She agreed which made him smile. She was so nice. He almost wondered if she was fake or something? Humoring the suicidal guy but he doubted that... she told him her story and she hadn't done that before.
ooc; yayness! [/blockquote] |
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